Darth Cookie

My last week has been summed up with total lack of respect for myself and my goals. I have gone to the dark side, its not good.

I have been eating 'whatever' and pretending like I'm having normal sized portions and I'm not. It's been proven to me time and times again, that when I stop really paying attention to what I'm eating that my old tricks resurface. This blogger said it best yesterday, and what he put to paper resonated with me.

I am not really at a place where I can manage my eating without being totally conscious. I'm not maintaining, and when I stop being vigilant I start gaining.

However, last nights dinner was both yummy for the tummy and good for the soul. It was a great gab session with two of my girlfriends and we enjoyed the evening a lot, not to mention that I hadn't had any good fish for a while - get in my omegas from the salmon!! I'm feeling puffy today, but I'm not surprised...I haven't had any water yet this morning...going to get some NOW.

The house is a total mess again.. I've been perpetually half cleaning the kitchen and leaving a sink full of dishes that pile up and up and up, while the dishwasher sits full of clean dishes. Its bad for cooking, not very motivating if I have to wash dishes before I can get to my dinner. I need to get that under control again ASAP.

Sleep….well, this is a goal that I set and I have yet to get over 7 hours in a single night in the last 2 weeks - apart from weekends where I sleep like a dead thing for 10 or 11 hours straight. So VERY unhealthy, yet such a very difficult pattern for me to break.

Bfast:
1coffee with cream
1 raison bran muffin
1 coffee with cream
Snack1:
Orange
Lunch:
Salad (spinach leaves, chickpeas, mushrooms, beets, cucumber, sprouts, tomato, ham, egg, cheese, 1T ranch dressing)
Whole grain bun
1 pat butter
Snack2:
Kiwi edit:: Went and got a mocha and DID NOT eat my kiwi (fug)
Snack3:
1 pot Activia yogurt
Snack4:
Orange

Dinner:
edit:: 3" slice of garlic bread (this was eaten while standing in the kitchen like a wild animal!)
2T extravirgin oliveoil
2T balsamic vinegar 4 small slices rye bread
3/4 avocado
1 can tuna in water
2oz swiss cheese

Tonight I'm going to get my sweat on at the gym and do an hour on the elliptical or on the treadmill, plus walking home and stairs. WEEEE!

PS - did you see.... NO MOCHA TODAY!! I got to break my whip cream morning habit.

PPS - I did end up getting a mocha (brutal) and then I did not walk down the stairs and I took the bus home... it was too bloody cold out.