Today I was GOING to go to the gym at lunch when I realized that I "didn't want to".... Starting up again is hard. Harder then I thought that it would be. I had everything that I needed at the office - I pay the money for the membership...I had my ipod, my undies, my runners.....but I also had enough excuses today that I didn't go.
Now, of course, I have remorse. Restarting that habit is going to be tough. I know that I love it, but then...why so reluctant? Tomorrow is my Beginners Yoga class. I'm going to go to that NO MATTER WHAT! I'm actually really looking forward to it. :)
I did walk home - since I felt some buyers remorse after my post-lunch snack.... then after dinner... BINGE time. Ug. I have NOTHING bad in the house - but that didn't stop me from going nuts. Its really still amazing how much food one can consume in such a short amount of time. I would say that I ate all that binge food in under 3min - including prep time. Then I came over here to purge...mentally that is. I was not wanting to blog today, but this... this I had to put down on paper for myself.
1.5c chicken curry
3/4c chocolate covered peanuts
*was not hungry and didn't even enjoy eating the last of them....didn't stop me though.
1 pork loin with 1/2T mint jelly
10 asparagus spears
5 new potatoes with xvoo and dill
8 new potatoes with xvoo and dill
4 slices turkey breast
2 triangles of laughing cow cheese
1 whole wheat pita
2T cashew nut better
Bleck...I feel like crap now. My stomach feels really tight (although I suppose that is actually a good thing in terms of good and bad in relation to out of control eating). Also I realized that I had not had a single swallow of water since about 4.45pm.... its now 10.30 at night and I'm getting my first drink. Double Arg! I wasn't hungry!!!! I was THIRSTY.
THIRSTY DAMN ME..... if I had had a pint of water I would have been fine and I would have gone to bed without all this useless food in me. ARG!
Lesson begining to be learned....
1. Don't keep binge foods in the house.
2. potatoes...yep - they set me off. Best not have that again anytime soon.